What most people have a hard time understanding is that as a child they developed behaviors and life coping strategies that revolve around surviving, safety and security. For example, children often lie to avoid punishments and they work very hard to become popular with larger social groups in their schools etc. Children are prone to do things like drink alcohol, do drugs or cause themselves other forms of long term harm……in order to prove to their peers that they’re worthy of taking their place inside the safe inner circle of their peer group. (their tribe) Again this is all about safety, security and survival. Being alone registers as a “greater chance of death” so children scramble to find safety in ANY herd, wolf pack or group possible. What most people don’t understand is that making decisions based on safety, fitting in, safety and survival is very different than making decisions based on happiness, success, wealth or health. If fact, in most cases, fitting in is the exact opposite of happiness. Fitting in usually makes everyone happy……except you.

The vast majority of adults run into massive problems today when they take these childlike coping mechanisms along with them into adulthood. If you look who the average person married, when they married, where they work, what they do in a day, what they say, what city they live in, what they think, what they post or don’t post on social media……each decision they’ve made in their life is based on the childhood coping mechanism of, “where am I more secure, safe and more likely to survive…and where will I get the most societal approval?” That’s a big problem in our adulthood because although we’re capable as adults of making decisions that increase our happiness, success, health and wealth (which often is the opposite of fitting in or gaining the approval of the herd)……it’s very easy to get trapped in our childhood programs of safety, security and survival. What this often comes down to is a life that makes us feel safe but it doesn’t make us happy.

Stepping into our true adult power is very important for people of adult age. If you’re having problems in your life, it’s most likely that you’re still trying to fit in and be safe…..which has almost ZERO ability to make you happy and successful. If you feel lost in your adult years or conflicted, you’re simply engaging in the oldest psychic battle in all of human history. A battle between the child’s need to be safe while having little confidence it can survive without herd approval vs the adult’s need to be happy and it knowing full well that an empowered adult can handle absolutely any situation thrown at them…….with or without the herd. You can start healing at anytime by understanding that you’re pre-wired to pick safe over happy…….and just start reversing the flow where you can. Child or adult? Make a move……..