Recently a man in our area was driving his car on a frozen river and he crashed through. A tremendous amount of fear and panic raced through his nervous system. His nervous system shut down, leaving the man wanting to exit his car but being unable to make his nervous system react in a logical way to the danger. Luckily a young ice fisherman nearby jumped under the water and pulled the man out. The young man also felt the fear, panic and danger (but to a lesser extent) and the rescuer’s nervous system also retracted, so he could get into the cold water without feeling it. The moral of the story here is that trauma, fear and panic can inhibit nervous system function or shut it down altogether.
Tiger Woods was at one time the best golfer in the world and there was no real second or even third. There was Tiger Woods and if he showed up to a golf tournament, everyone knew he would win, including the other golfers. No other athlete in world history dominated in this manner and there appeared no stopping Tiger…….until he experienced the trauma, pain and fear of a martial dispute gone public. After the fear, pain and trauma ripped through Tiger’s nervous system (based on the public exposure of his affair) he never dominated again, ever, although he tried as hard as he could to return to form. This is how powerful pain, fear and trauma is on the body……as it can disturb or completely disable our nervous systems.
What is odd about self sabotage is that it’s based on this exact cycle but we do it to ourselves. The first ingredient to self sabotage is often pain, fear and trauma in our childhood. Our nervous systems do us a favor, as they shut off naturally, when fear and trauma enter us…….so we can ride out the storm and not feel as much pain. The painful event passes and our nervous system comes back on line, the storm is over and we’re supposed to get on with our life. That’s when self sabotage comes into the picture. As our nervous system comes back on line, we think about the painful event more and we’re supposed to deal with it but in our “quick fix“, “instant gratification” and “pleasure at all costs” society, we aren’t really interested in processing the pain naturally, so that it eventually leaves our system. The natural processing of pain isn’t even really permitted in our society. Pain is looked at as a sickness in itself. If you’re in pain….take a pill, sedate, medicate. That’s how North America rolls. Avoid, distract and sedate. This doesn’t work for long term happiness, for very concrete reasons.
In the natural world the painful event passes, our nervous systems come back on line, we’re supposed to look our painful event in the eye, learn from it and move on to greener pastures. Enter our sedation and medication based society. So instead of allowing the regressed pain to surface mentally (after the actual painful event is over) we’re taught to sedate and medicate the pain……so it stays stuck inside ourselves and never leaves. That’s a big mistake and this is what’s causing so much disease in our society. This means the pain grows overtime and other painful events are piled on top of each other, because the pain energy is never processed out of the system. This makes our mind and soul more like a psychic junk yard, full to the brim. An emotional eater at night is said to be trying to push down her negative emotions coming up, with sedative food going down. Eating the feel good emotions in the junk food, as a way to override the processing of her painful reality, which of course has to be done eventually if we desire balance in our life once more.
The primary blockers of processing and dealing with pain are 1) coffee and caffeine stimulants 2) alcohol 3) cigarettes 4) sex 5) marijuana 6) junk food 7) medial and over the counter pain killers 8) exercise (and you thought there’s a million gyms in North America because everyone wants to be healthy) 9) and oddly enough a host of other fears can disconnect the nervous system AGAIN like all medical toxins, scary movies, risky behaviors, driving fast, affairs, crisis, debt, violence, army enrollment, violent video games, drama, gossip etc etc. So in order to forget our fear, we often create more fear, so our nervous system doesn’t process any fear, because fear shuts down the nervous system. An odd and illogical cycle indeed but there it is, none the less.
So as the pain from our past comes to the surface soon after the painful events has passed and we’re supposed to learn from it (and have it leave our system) we block that process with the above sedation and painkilling modalities, therefore turning our own nervous systems off line, so we don’t feel our pain. This means the pain is never processed out of the body, we never learn from our pain, we never change from our pain, we get trapped in a permanent childhood and we kill ourselves very quickly because all those modalities mentioned above destroy the body as they turn off the nervous system. This is why smokers smoke, drinkers drink, cheaters cheat, the obese keep eating………because as the pain grows, so the addiction grows. I’m guessing here of course but I imagine that Tiger Woods started to use extra marital sex (and other pain killing modalities) to sedate to the pain of his father’s death and like all self sabotage cycles, the act of avoiding one’s pain (instead of dealing with it) eventually destroys everything in your life that you hold dear. The fear of his father’s death can itself activate a part of the brain famous for low IQ processes and short term thinking…….and that alone could have set Tiger Woods spinning into the abyss. Just some educated guesses. In an upcoming 12 week video course on self sabotage I’ll explain this entire cycle and what needs to be done to walk hand in hand with your inner saboteur into a prosperous and bright future.
Great article!
“because the pain grows, so the addiction grows” Thank you for sharing this wonderful article Jason. I saw many truths in what you said.
I am a big time emotional eater. I was wondering why I can eat great and healthy during the day, but come 6 or 7pm, I start eating crap food to no end.
Thank you again my friend.
Patrick
Another excellent article. I look forward to the solution.
Where do we find your audio’s?
They will be ready soon JB. Follow on facebook for the announcement. Thank you for the interest.
Thanks for this article- a lot of well thought out points and good ideas. But now that you’ve mentioned the fact that many or most people have hidden pain of some kind they haven’t dealt with properly and have unhealthy and damaging coping methods like drinking, smoking, sex, bad food, etc (and I would agree with all of that)- what is the alternative? How can people who are older with pain from 2, 5 or 20+ years ago learn to properly deal with that pain of they didn’t at the time, and have been coping imporoperly for years? Counseling? Prayer? Spending time with good people? What are ways to heal ourselves of those long-lost traumas that wreak havoc on our lives and get back to a holistically healthy lifestyle?
No healing will ever be found seeking help from the outside. That’s a trap. I explain things here. https://oldsite.jchristoff.com/10-step-plan-to-over-come-addiction-and-make-peace-with-your-inner-saboteur/
One of your best articles Jason Thank you ❤️