Are you too pretty or too attractive? Maybe you’re too thin? Maybe your life is going too good and you’re starting to climb too high. Well, have I got the answer for you. BOOZE! If you’re tired or scared of accomplishing everything you could ever dream of, you need booze. Booze can make you fat, stupid, broke and best of all………..when you’re mediocre, you’ll never offend anyone. The best way to never fail, is never to try…….and booze will get you there! Why stand out when you can just fit in….with all the other drunken half-wits. The testimonials tell the real story. Stacy from Idaho says several hard nights of boozing has got her 3 children (all under 5), all by different Dads, none of which have stayed around to raise them. Jim from Arkansas says he got in a drunken bar brawl one night and was awarded a criminal record for his troubles, so now he just got fired from that great paying job he had. Age faster, do stupid things, build a bad reputation, say things that should never be said, get a big gut hanging over your pants and be so drunk…….that you still think you’re sexy, even though you’re a complete and utter human mess. Maximize your dumbness. Forget aiming for the stars, just fall down the stairs. Booze has it all. Booze never says no. Get booze, party like a slave star and drive your life right into the ditch. Work a job you hate, in order to buy things you don’t need and then when the weekend comes along……get drunk, instead of trying to actually change your life. Caffeine for the week. Booze for the weekend. Enslave yourself and then complain about your shitty life all year long. There’s nothing else like it. Your worst life, delivered right to your door in 30 minutes or less….or it’s absolutely free. Get your booze today. Call now…….1.888.SLAVERY
This message brought to you by the ruling families who masquerade as your altruistic governments. Obey, comply, consume, sedate, distract, repeat. For your rulers to be more, you (the slave) must be less. We thank you for your voluntary compliance to the slave life and the fine art of dis-empowered living. May the odds be ever in your favor.
The Bierstick shoots beer down your throat
This Bierstick will take your drinking games to the next level. Buy it here: https://amzn.to/2INnLq9
Posted by In The Know Gadgets on Saturday, May 26, 2018


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